Did you bring your skills today, or did they take a day off?
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Your reaction time is measured in hours, not seconds
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Even the loading screen hints have given up on you
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That wasn’t a mistake, that was a personality trait
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You didn’t lose the fight, you forfeited it in advance
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If skills were currency, you’d be bankrupt.
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Your aim is so off, even luck filed a restraining order.
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You’re proof that effort and outcome are not always correlated
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That attempt? Recyclable at best. Probably landfill.
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Reflexes so slow, the loading screen asked if you’re still there.
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Your strategy was a plot twist—mostly for your team.
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Pro tip: Try turning the brain on before the game.
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You’re the reason tooltips exist
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Even the tutorial would like a rematch.
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Aim assist saw you and resigned.
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You pressed all the right buttons—in the wrong order.
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That’s not trial and error, that’s error and error
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You didn’t miss—reality dodged.
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